Do I LOOK like a people person?

Where do you go when the world lets you down?
When all that you’ve clung to has fallen to the ground
When the pillars that held your roof up safe and sound
Come crashing down

Where do you go you little sensitive soul?
You poor little boy,
Surrounded by so many yet always alone?
Now where will you go my son?

Where will you go when the sun stops shining?
Where will you go when the moon does not rise?
Where will you go when the waves stop crashing?
Where will you go when the river reaches its end?

And when will you be happy at the rate that you’re running?
Running away from everything you know
Too scared to touch, too proud to experiment
Too bad for your soul, where will you go?

Women

Bah! they are good for one thing and one thing only. cooking. and maybe a couple other things. when i was young i  never felt the urge to associate with them. i changed my mind somewhere down the line and now im suffering!! argh. they are distracting! 

They distract me when i walk down the road, they distract me in class, they distract me when i look over my cubilcle at the guy-next-to-me's PC. they distract me at work in general. i just cant help noticing them. their curves, how they hold their neck up. is she confident? is she proud? or is she just too scared to be her-self?

i am fucking intrigued by them. i tell you they are a scourge on humanity.

and their hair! now dont get me talking about their hair! theres nothing like a well endowed graceful figure of a woman raising her arms up to tie her long glossy black hair into a ponytail to stop you mind from working. At moments like that you just tend to glaze over and there seems to be this primal instinct that kicks in and forces you to slump in your chair and stare like a moron. God! the hair. Fuck.

Man, if i could i would brianwash myself into not thinking about women. its even worse if you're in a relationship with one of them. cos then you feel guilty everytime you admire another one of them. No, much better in fact, to be like a zoologist on a safari or something. if you have to look.

My Psycho Chick

So everyone’s talking about the psycho chick they’ve loved

I’ve loved one too but it wasn’t she who was insane

‘Twas me my friend I was head over heels

Over head over heels over heels over head.

In love I smelled the flowers in the warm breeze

I was picturing us lying on blankets so soft

Laughing while I played with her hair

Oh this is too soppy to bear.

So I’ll get to the bottom line,

She rejected me and the world lost its shine.

But not really ‘cos then I realized

I loved her more for the way she made me feel

Not for who she was inside.

I loved her selfishly

Selfishly did I adore

That psycho chick did not need an encore.

She needed a total bore

A bore who would love her for who she was to the core.

But she had beautiful eyes

And if I still met her once in a while

Under her spell I may fall once again a prisoner

To go starry eyed

To feel the magic again, soaking up my spine.

Here's a question...

for all you gay people and pro-gay people out there.

If the whole of the world's population were to turn gay, would that be ok?

And if that happened, wouldn't the human race disappear over the course of one generation?

Ok that was a couple of questions. Sorry about that.

I know there are a lot of intelligent people out there who proudly uphold the cause of gay people, and I want to know if they've thought through this particular (longer term, but albeit relevant) aspect of the whole thing.

So fire away.

Electornmin signald ofrom the sttrocmach

Sometimes I feel the urge to write nothing but nonsense. OSmething that Does not make ssenss. Nopt give a shiot about typos. Spelling mistakes oh wait they are the same thing. Not gove a fuck about people seing even though they will. Free form baby all the way./

Naked on abeach I will starte at the clouds on the night sky. Im not giving a shot about grammaer either. The stars will come out and they will twinkile at me and sai look at that little bugger standing nake d on the beacj looking uop at asu.

Listen to the harkeing sould of the albatross on the waves surfing on a surfboard that is colored neon black. See the wavses split apwar and watch the sight of the sound in thesea of the brown formerly shark infested water slip down in to the abuss of the aimless silence below

Watch the people know, watch them explore the limits of sanoty, watch them stand in the grey border of where sense meets madness and judge you who are standin on a mountain of you own inventyion.

Swear. The gfreedon to sear, it’s a free fucking country isn’t it? It’s a free country nut the words will come out in a blurred monotone whjen your piss drunk and think you are brad pitt wit Jim carrey sense of humor before it wen t bad. Also cool like depp and crazy in a very fetching way like earnest hemingway. Hemingwway? LIESTEN to me////////

Kkkrrrchhtt….

Transmission ends.

HIDE

The cold is so bracing the past is embracing

Sometimes I feel I want to fucking hide away.

Inside the pacing on the footsteps of my conscience

Knocking up a racket in my heart.

Every step, every whoosh of a foot lifted up

Swirls me in disgust and fear does not forgive,

It’s hard to control in the enveloping dark.

Sometimes I feel I want to hide away from all this

Get away and run off to a dead black jungle somewhere

Run away and live in the dark.

I want to hide, from sick, shriveling lives

I want to hide from the neoliberal inside.

I want to hide from the oppressing squirm

Of the pressure inflicted upon me by my dastardly ambition.

The dead bride of my inhibition

A carcass tied to my hand.

Dragging me, weighing me down.

So am I wrong? And can you blame me if I say

That sometimes I just want to hide the fuck away?

Just want to get away

Just want to escape

Just want

Out.

Male Strippers

…are short in supply. There are various hen parties in Sri Lanka taking place as we speak, well not AS we speak since it is daytime now and most hen parties tend to take place at night, with many forlorn women chugging the wine out of sheer boredom and misery because of a lack of lascivious male bodies sheathed in a coating of oil, shaking to ‘I will survive’, to entertain them.

Jeremiah Sunandasami Johnson, an enterprising er, entrepreneur, has decided to change all that, and it is with the plight of these poor neglected ladies in mind that I publish this short (and rather drab I should add) PR cum advertising supplement courtesy his newly incorporated organization.

Entrepreneurship is at its best when a potential entrepreneur identifies an unsatisfied market segment and caters to it. The more unsatisfied the better. And my research has indicated that there are some VERY unsatisfied ladies around Colombo especially during the months of June & July and from September to December.

‘An organization of male exotic dancers to cater to the exclusive tastes of the discerning Sri Lankan woman of marriageable age’ is what I propose. An exclusively positioned service organization that offers the best and only service of it’s like to a select clientele. I am currently looking for investors although not much investment is needed in terms of infrastructure due to the purely service oriented approach of the whole operation, my main needs are performers.

ARE YOU MALE, between the ages of 19 and 30, possess an attractive physique and great rhythm in your bones? (bones? lol - W). Then drop me a mail with a recent picture and let’s set up a meeting. An attractive remuneration package and numerous perks (er hehe - W) await you!

I am also looking for ideas on how to improve my business model and incorporate needs and wants that may have escaped my attention. So please do contribute your ideas and be entitled to win gift vouchers, DVDs, t-shirts and even investment opportunities! Come share in our success!

Thank you.

Jeremiah Sunandasami Johnson.

jsjenter@hotmail.com

That’s it folks. So please help Mister Johnson out will you, he’s got a great idea I think and I’m sure he can boost up our economy a bit.

Jujups

I'm sitting in the bus today and there's a lady sitting across from me to my right.

Suddenly she starts rummaging in her bag. The bus turns in from the bridge and i look up at the digital clock in the front. Its 8.20! gonna be a bit late to work again...

I look across at the lady, she's got a pack of jujups in her hand.

She starts eating them. One.. Two.. Three..Four..

I'm watching from the corner of my eye..Suddenly remembering that I need to try and glance through some notes while ive got some time. I look at the clock again 8.21.

My eyes are dragged back to the lady on my right. She's devouring the jujups like er, well, let's just say she was devouring them shall we?

Five.. Six..

She's delicately taking them out of the pack one by one and shaking them into the pack as if there are stray drops of sugary honey dripping off of them and she's afraid of them dripping on her shirt. In reality they are just regular sugary, colorful jujups. I imagine their rubbery taste.

Seven.. Eight.. Nine...

The pack finishes. she calmly puts the piece of wrapper ripped off when she opened it back inside. Wipes her mouth with one hand. I look at the clock again. it's 8.22.

I feel slightly pukish.

Religion Bashing

Calling religion ‘bullshit’ because of the actions of those who practice it is somewhat akin to denouncing democracy after taking one look at, for e.g. the Sri Lankan parliament. How many wars have been fought in the name of religion? Quite a few, yes. How many have been fought in the name of country and empire? Lots more. So why don’t we just abolish the existing world governance system and just stop believing it will work? Why don’t we let the world slip into anarchy and see where we end up?

We can’t do that. We won’t do that because in essence, we know, democracy is a good thing. Its fundamental concept, its basic idea, makes sense; The majority gets together and decides who should take care of the tedious job of ruling the land. That’s what it’s supposed to be. But factor in self centered power hungry individuals, vast legal infrastructure that is easily manipulated, unconcerned masses, and years and years of ‘doing the same thing’ and you get the melting pot of world politics that we still believe we can ‘fix’ without calling ‘democracy’ itself ‘stupid’.

We are living in a world where it’s cool to diss religion but for e.g. it is not cool to diss one’s right to an abortion. It is also not cool to diss the government, not very loudly at least, lest you get ‘white-vanned’, but it’s cool to turn a blind eye on hundreds upon hundreds of civilians being killed in the name of ‘fighting terror’. After all it’s the Americans and most of the Western world that are doing it, and they are not fighting in the name of religion are they? They are apparently, fighting in the name of democracy and sovereignty. Look at Vietnam, Iraq, Palestine/ Israel, Panama, Georgia etc. etc. etc the list is endless.

So does that mean we can call ‘democracy’ ‘stupid’? No I believe, and I believe that you believe it’s only certain practitioners of it that make it so and it would be extremely shallow and simply wrong to group everyone who advocates democracy (which includes us voters) and call them stupid too.

‘I’ve always said that God has been the leading cause of human death’ says fellow blogger Dinidu de Alwis. He, to put it simply, is plain wrong or has simply not thought out his statement properly. The leading cause of human death would obviously be natural causes. Hurricanes, tsunamis, earthquakes, old age, disease etc. through the ages of human history. Blame it on lack of technology or knowledge, but to blame it on God would mean accepting He exists, and for a self declared atheist that would be unthinkable.

But in case he was talking simply about conflict. And God being the cause of human death as a result if fuelling religious extremism, then I’d like to have a look at his statistics sheet. For like I said, enough wars have been fought in the name of empire building alone to dwarf any other type of conflict in the history of the human race. World War II/I, The Roman Empire building spree (before Constantinople), Colonialization/ Invasion and I can go on. Sure, religion would have been used as an excuse in certain cases, but to brand these cases under the label of ‘religious warfare’ would be quite erroneous.

The collective human psyche is a complex thing. Wars and conflicts start when people get carried away with generalizations and when reason gives way to fear and anger. War (and as a consequence; death) happens, in most cases, when people stop thinking straight and start becoming, for the lack of a more diplomatic term, ‘Stupid’.

On Belief

Release is wonderful. Us people we always try superficial methods of freeing ourselves from obstacles that hamper us. Things that deceive us. Things that prevent us from understanding our true selves.

Do you believe? and is belief such a hard thing to execute?

Yes. i would say it is. True belief involves giving up a certain degree of rationality. True belief involves faith. You believe in your lover? but how do you know he or she wont turn around and cheat on you the next day? how do you know that despite all that you know of that person, the next day, things could be turned on their head? Your lover is after all, a person just like you. Who could quite acceptably, even unbeknownst to you, feel differently to the way you feel about them. So isn't it faith that keeps us going everyday?

Human beings are creatures of faith. We believe that the sky won't fall on our heads tomorrow. Sure, we might attribute it to a science which tell us that there are no meteors on a collision course with our planet, but how exact is science? those who claim to believe in science are simply claiming to believe in human ignorance.

For that is what 'science' symbolizes, human ignorance. Unfortunately, a term that should be used to describe the expansion of human knowledge, is used to describe the come all and be all of what we are all about. We have become slaves to progression. we are supreme in our belief that we are in our optimum. just look at the Egyptians. they thought they were 'It' at the time. So did the Mayans and I'll bet my last inflated rupee that the Babylonians thought the same. And if you are partial to a fantastical train of thought, then so did the amazingly advanced Atlantians that sunk into the ocean bubbling in decadence born of a magical advancement.

For science doesn't tell us how much we know, as it tells us how much we don't know. Science is but the culmination of existing human knowledge. to 'believe' in it is a folly. when science itself has proven itself wrong many times over. we believe in an objective phenomenon. nothing more. nothing less.

My point is this; There is a lot we know, true. But what we know doesn't even come close in comparison to what we don't know. What I'm trying to say is we might know a whole lot of shit. But the shit that we don't know, is probably enough to keep the sewage systems of several universes running at a steady pace for light years (taken as purely a measurement of time).

So do you believe in science? Do you believe that God does not exist? But how do you know when science has not disproven God's existence? When science does not even get close to exactly defining what goes on in our own heads when we form a single thought, or a single wisp of a dream? No, science is nothing. It is simply the fundamental core of human knowledge. That's all it is.

Just look at the stars. Tell me, do you believe? Do you believe in scale and size? do you believe in fate and the unknown? Do you have faith? OF course you do, you start the day with it every morning. You believe in the unknown everyday. For everyday is a mystery waiting to be discovered, to delve into a cliche, and everyday is potentially damned or blessed. So let's not be audacious here.

'A rose by any other name would smell as sweet'

Went under the influence again. Picked up the ganja boy. He took us to this location in Wellawatte. Gall Road. No weed there though. Too bad.

Came off disappointed and when to location number 2. Place down passing Williams. and this time badu had.

Came to my friends place at bamba. wrapped it. 3 packs. 6 joints and enough left over to fill up a cigarette.

Started smoking.

First, the paranoia spreads. Ado what r we gona do if the cops walk in? it's not like the cops randomly walk in, or have ever walked in, into my friends house. but we were smoking in the garden outside, with some soothing music on, and number one topic of conversation was how to get rid of the leftovers from the whole process of wrapping and preparation. flushing wouldnt work, too many floaty bits. Cant walk into the road and throw it out. Cops might see you and get nosy. Cant chuck it in the drain. What if some shithead saw it falling into the ocean. Dude the cops could come up the drain and attack us from behind! Laughs.

The rest of it is hazy, and the smoke didnt help either. I hate the moments of remarkably truthful insights that hit you when your high. the truth hurts. but most of its not negative, though you dont tend to notice the positive much cos your feeling good most of the time. so you only tend to notice when the good thoughts give away to something extraordinarily sharp and piercing.

Clichés are flung around with reckless abandon. All their clicheness disappearing in the mass of original thought trains reaching their culmination. Making every single statement an end of a journey of independent thought;

'Whats ina rose?'

Blank stares.

Er, I mean, 'Whats in a name?'

Long pause for effect. Then,

'A rose by any other name would smell as sweet'.

Profound silence.

That sort of thing.

Weird snatches of wisdom, that had to have been documented then and there to be thought over later in order to be made sense out of. Sinhalese proverbs translate to english.

'Tree fall man bull prick'

'Twig break, chair make'

and...

'(pointing to shoulder) here wait, ear eat'

the smoke. Its all over the place. The stuff was alright. There is a nursery in my friends house. and in the hall there is a playhouse. I go in there and chill out. listening to some music. It's Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin.

Went back in time to finish the last bit of the little cigarette (that was not). Then sat back and wrote a poem.

Its 1.00 am. we are going to pilla to get some food. I call a cab. to go home. got a meeting in the morning. He drives fast. im scared, then thrilled, then bored, then i forget all about the van until he asks me 'how much more to go sir'?

Just a little bit more. Ate. Slept. Its been a good few months since i did this.