Monday, July 13, 2009

100 words

100 words?

do you even know how small a write up of one hundred words is?

i was a squrrel, running on the trees in the upper Ramtops when Nanny Ogg converted me into a lovely damsel that seduced the king and is now queen of Lancre

I am the beast inside HAL that morphed into physical form when my last passenger left me and now i roam in search of those that installed the monoliths on my home moon

i am the last spark of mordor within which the ring buried its evil power and now i float on, ever burning seeking a cool flower to embed my spark in.

I am the avenger of Torts that struck wonderland and killed the queen (off with her head! i said) and i am at this very moment seeking a way in through your looking glass

i am the ghost of the past. that sells you the absense of fake turkeys and bathes you in false ideals to invoke guilty consciences in the name of a dread demon.

i am poverty personified i am the reason you asked for more and got nothing. i am the cause of your Twisted life; through all the dust, grease and grime of London

I am the seaman tht killed the whale that got immortalized because i killed him. That Dick.

I am the prick. that caused Man Friday to leave only a single footprint on the beach cos he was too busy hopping. he hopped on a tree and waited for his master to come bend over below him

i am steel. steel beneath skin that made the greatest of them all from nothing to rule the world in the heavyweight championship ring.

i am the beast that proweled the misty nights and gave the poor Count a bad name; and gave your girlfriends shivers and frights

i am no one. nothing if i cannot describe myself so that i can be seen. if i do not scream you do not see, you are blind and i am compelled to boast and reveal myself naked beneath spotlights to make you see me.

blasted job application forms.

12 Comments:

Jerry said...

Hahahaa

Jerry said...

Hahahaa

Scrumps said...

They do suck indeed! But some very nice writing! :-P

ηiRσ said...

Very creative! I had the same problem when I had to make my cv for internship..I mean are they going to give us the job based on qualifications or for our prose writing? sheesh!

Makuluwo said...

Haha! Crazy coot! I can imagine the looks on their faces reading this on a job app. :P

Harshi said...

Some are familiar but some are not. Still.. very interesting. You should send one of them right away with your Resume, and the job is yours! lol

Lady divine said...

hahahaaa...
thanks for the morning dose of laughter! I needed it!

Finally took time to do my cv the last two days... and now comes the hard part!

TheWhacksteR said...

jerry- gee thanks man, it was so funny you went and laughed twice!

scrump - thanks! unfortunately i don't think potential employers will appreciate this kind of writing on job apps.

Niro - talk about it. boggles my mind as well.

Harumi - the discworld, 2001, LOTR, Alice in wonderland, a christmas carol, oliver twist, moby dick, robinson crusoe, Muhammad Ali - the greatest, Dracula..

hmmm.. maybe i'll think abt it, thanks!

LD - ur most welcome! yes the hard part.....good luck LD

Cadence said...

lol application woes eh? good stuff. :)

TheWhacksteR said...

well not the application woes!

Sach said...

:O
I think I need to read it again.

Angel said...

I vote for the Nanny Ogg one! Do, do put that in your application form!