Corporate Blues

waking up on a monday afternoon to the lull of the ocean,
inside my head.
A dream takes over as the music trips.
I am a corporate dreamer
dreaming of the demise of the corporation.

Im a sleepwalker
waking up on a hammock in the kitchen garden.
the grass meanders down
and mingles with the sand,
the sand meanders down
to the water, gentle, lapping, lazy.
Just like me.

Lingerie Beach

If there was ever a story that competed for the prize of most amount of idiotic characters it would be Troy. Or the Illiad. Now don't get me wrong, im a greek mythology buff just like you, or unlike you, but you've gotta admit the fact.

And Priam was the biggest fool of them all.

I had forgotten how great a run and a dip in the sea felt like since i left Wadduwa. The last time it was around 11 in the morning. On weekeds i'd run till i couldn't run anymore down the southern stretch of beach. then it was my habit to find a log in front of some still under construction hotel or deserted coconut estate and play the Michaelangelo.

That day i was just gazing at the water and i saw some chap in there waist deep just lounging, and it hit me like a wild coconut; how come i never thought of that before? So there was i, in the water for about half an hour, practically deserted beach, blue sea under a sun in an even bluer sky. Damn, the waves were so cool, the sand...

Ah best memories album, this one belongs in that.

Today it was at Mount beach, around 7pm. it was crowded. but i still spent some time in the water. ah the city aint got nothing on Wadduwa. But i'll tell you about one interesting place on Mount beach; once you pass all the restaurants on the nothern side, and keep going, you come to a deserted area which restaurants and tourists have failed to infiltrate. there are a few slums i think. You keep going and you soon come upto this potrusion of rock.

Its quite wide and there's some sort of building on top of it. and you cant reach it unless the tide is low. its a cool place. to the north you can see the whole shoreline of Colombo, with the lights glittering in the dark, and to the south its mount beach.

parking is a bitch though. a word of advice, its absolutely hopeless driving down beach road past the last turn off on weekend evenings or any other crowded time. You wont be able to find any parking one, and even if you do; two you'll have to bend in five different directions at the same time on the way back.

Once you're done running, you can grab a juice. theres a good place on Galle road somewhere opposite Lion Pub. Affordable and it'd prolly be a safe bet to say that they can and have made a juice out of any fruit in season at the moment. you can even get em with ice cream..

mmm.. ice cream.

Today's post courtesy; The Lingerie Industry; because you know your man deserves it..I guess you have to do a project on it to realize that thong swimwear comes in male versions as well.

Some pictures

So I'v moved houses. Moved a week or so ago actually. On independence day. I'm gonna miss our old place close to Wadduwa. The beach was absolutely fantastic, and even orgasmic to some people. Anyways, took some pics to remember the place by, and to try and remember the crisp feel of the morning air on those occasions when I dragged myself for a run, followed by the tingling scary feel of pulsing adrenaline when those effing rabid dogs start chasing me. Reason enough to carry a stick and go. Last time i ran bare chested like a fisherman all the way past Blue Waters and beyond and sat on a log for a while, then waded in the water. Its funny, never actually went into the water all that much.

Here are some pictures of home (former home).

 one of numerous paths to the beach

                                                                        

 south

                                                                         

north

                                                                              

 South again

                                                                            

 no, not my house

                                                                

 

the glorious water, bathing spots are further south though

                                                                          

if you sit and close your eyes, the waves sound like they're lapping at your feet when they're a good 20 feet away

                             

The railway tracks, there's a station at the end of that curve

                                                                              

Snappy

Damn, is everyone having a bad time? I swear, things have been doing the solo from 'November rain' on my nerves all week! Twanging them and twisting them beyond all recognition. This morning I lost my temper with my mother. Something I immediately regretted. Apologized right away though. Last person I want to hurt is my mama (makes gurgly baby noises)

Ok now back to my week. It all started with my ex. She doesn’t consider a conversation worthwhile unless she manages to piss me off somehow. She keeps going on and on pushing my buttons and I always keep my composure you see? but somehow she breached all my defenses yesterday and boom! I went Fick.

Some might wonder, if she's my ex why am i still talking to her? plain answer is I don’t know. Its not like we're romantically involved anymore. that ended a long time ago. But we tried, very stupidly it seems. to do the whole 'lets be friends thing' and before you know it, when we are in the middle of a totally normal conversation some monster from the past creeps in and metamorphoses into a raging beast of wrath destroying everything in its wake.

You know when you're sms'ing someone and things start getting heated up and pretty soon you're having two different conversations at the same time? when that happens, either someone backs down or someone cracks and unleashes the verbal demon so to speak. because pretty soon, two conversations turn into three conversations when you start having to discuss several points at the same time, and start splitting up more and more so it’s not surprising that pretty soon everything blows up sky high.

You might wonder how I’ve become such an expert on the intricacies of sms dominated conversation. Well you try having a long standing relationship with someone with sms as the chief (and mostly only) mode of conversation, and see. ‘Unhealthy’ you may say. I'll say 'uh, you think?'

Add to that an annoying iron that burns your shirt in the morning, the discovery that you have run out of clothes to wear and your laundry has been piling up, rabid dogs ganging up on you on the beach, people at work being total bitches, losing your temper at these bitches, exams looming up, assignments looming up, delayed presentations, delayed personal portfolio documents, disillusionment about my job and an unfulfilled dream to break away and get out of this place to somewhere free and floating and you will probably understand why I’m not that much of a happy puppy these days.

So if I yell at you, please understand it’s nothing personal, I’m just mentally charged up and badly in need of a fight. Any takers? Huh? ANYONE WANT A PIECE OF THIS?????*


*kidding kidding, Im calm. Ooomm, oomm, ah, i am a flower on a green field, floating like a feather, drifting on a summer breeze, a wisp of cloud. Ahh.

Shagger on the beach!

You gotta realize now I am not using 'shag' here in the traditional Brightish sense of the word. Or, to put it in another way, I don’t mean by saying 'shag' that two people are going at it like a couple of dogs in mating season suddenly realizing that unbeknownst to them, they have moved to the middle of the high road in the heat of passion. Ok, them moving to the high road in the heat of passion is not really relevant to the explanation. But what the hell, It’s funny seeing those critters in mid-orgasm thinking WTF! When they suddenly see a full scale Ashok Leyland Viking bearing down upon them with all its fury. Screaming conductors probably don’t help the situation.

But getting back to the point, by 'shag' I simply meant a guy jerking himself off, in strict Sri Lankan singlo-english urban lingo. The same lingo in which saying 'fit' indicates that one is in agreement with something and tells nothing in particular about one's health. And where 'bugger' is idly flung around to describe anybody from your 4 year-old kid to your deceased English master and no forceful anal sex is even remotely implied therein. Remnants of a colonial age? Maybe the 'bugger', but the 'shag' I’m not so sure about. Anthropologists?

Anyway, getting to the interesting bit and to the root of all this dilly dallying on slang and the greater meaning of life, I saw a gentleman on the beach jerking off today. I mean like WTF? A guy goes for a peaceful run in the morning to stretch his limbs and kick start his day, and some chap standing with only a t-shirt on calmly jerking himself off with one hand while occasionally scratching his baby white butt with the other is NOT exactly something he generally wants to see. Add to that the whole ethical code of behavior thing. Don’t they have that kinda thing on Sri Lankan beaches? I mean sure, there are many people who regularly take an early morning dump, some of them calmly smoking a beedee or reading a paper (it's true, I’ve seen them) but that’s normal. See, I can handle (by handle i mean that my mentality can effectively cope up with) gnarled old Sri Lankan men doing a load on the beach ‘cos i know they probably dont have another option. And it’s only a few of them anyway. After the tsunami, the beach near where I live has simply turned into something almost from a travel guide to 'exotic third world locations' like. Lush greenery, wide, hardly polluted beaches, fine salty air, the occasional rabid dog, and a partly destroyed holiday home that the owners never got around to repairing.

Now there's something about seeing a chap calmly standing there looking at far off fishermen pulling in that big net (the name of which I forget) and calmly shaking his little white weener that is just enough to turn me a bit green. And you can bet it’s not with envy. He was just walking into the beach when I was passing the deserted bungalow. He was decently clothed then in a pair of shorts and a t-shirt yeah? On the way back though I was forced to witness the spectacle that I just went through with you.

I yelled 'Hey what the f*ck man?' while running past him. he just looked up, with a slightly surprised, affronted look on his face as if I was invading his privacy. Didn’t even have the decency to look embarrassed. Was working his hand up and down the whole time. I did the whole circling-your-index-finger-a-little-above-the-vicinity-of-your-ear thing that I know to universally mean 'you’re crazy' and ran on. Just hope he wasn’t spotted by any of the fishermen or tough beach dwellers living out there. They can get a bit sensitive about these things. You gotta have some cultural savvy you know. Damned foreigners.