Damn, is everyone having a bad time? I swear, things have been doing the solo from 'November rain' on my nerves all week! Twanging them and twisting them beyond all recognition. This morning I lost my temper with my mother. Something I immediately regretted. Apologized right away though. Last person I want to hurt is my mama (makes gurgly baby noises)
Ok now back to my week. It all started with my ex. She doesn’t consider a conversation worthwhile unless she manages to piss me off somehow. She keeps going on and on pushing my buttons and I always keep my composure you see? but somehow she breached all my defenses yesterday and boom! I went Fick.
Some might wonder, if she's my ex why am i still talking to her? plain answer is I don’t know. Its not like we're romantically involved anymore. that ended a long time ago. But we tried, very stupidly it seems. to do the whole 'lets be friends thing' and before you know it, when we are in the middle of a totally normal conversation some monster from the past creeps in and metamorphoses into a raging beast of wrath destroying everything in its wake.
You know when you're sms'ing someone and things start getting heated up and pretty soon you're having two different conversations at the same time? when that happens, either someone backs down or someone cracks and unleashes the verbal demon so to speak. because pretty soon, two conversations turn into three conversations when you start having to discuss several points at the same time, and start splitting up more and more so it’s not surprising that pretty soon everything blows up sky high.
You might wonder how I’ve become such an expert on the intricacies of sms dominated conversation. Well you try having a long standing relationship with someone with sms as the chief (and mostly only) mode of conversation, and see. ‘Unhealthy’ you may say. I'll say 'uh, you think?'
Add to that an annoying iron that burns your shirt in the morning, the discovery that you have run out of clothes to wear and your laundry has been piling up, rabid dogs ganging up on you on the beach, people at work being total bitches, losing your temper at these bitches, exams looming up, assignments looming up, delayed presentations, delayed personal portfolio documents, disillusionment about my job and an unfulfilled dream to break away and get out of this place to somewhere free and floating and you will probably understand why I’m not that much of a happy puppy these days.
So if I yell at you, please understand it’s nothing personal, I’m just mentally charged up and badly in need of a fight. Any takers? Huh? ANYONE WANT A PIECE OF THIS?????*
*kidding kidding, Im calm. Ooomm, oomm, ah, i am a flower on a green field, floating like a feather, drifting on a summer breeze, a wisp of cloud. Ahh.